I set my first audacious goal over 20 years ago.
I was 9 years old and with much encouragement, guidance and coaching from my parents, I decided I wanted to play the highest level of university basketball in the world, NCAA Division 1.
This audacious goal (kids in Canada didn’t go D.1 at the time) marked the beginning of a long journey, an 8 year roller coaster ride – when I stpped off on the other side I would be a changed human for the better.
Now, 20+ years later I look back at that experience along with all the goal setting experience I have accumulated and ask myself: why is this process important? What is it that we actually get out of the process of setting and pursuing goals? How do we ensure we can execute this process effectively to get the most value out of it?
To Dream or Not to Dream
I take for granted that I have been taught first by my parents and then dozens of mentors and world class leaders the various tactics and strategies to set and pursue effective goals – this has allowed me to evaluate, test, and ultimately own the process for myself today.
As my wife and I watch the latest season of Last Chance U I observe one of the players with his goals written on the wall, one of the bullet points, “ball out”, I remember that not all goals are equal. Great intention, poor execution.
With goal setting and dream pursuing the delta between intention and execution does matter.
At the same time I have come to learn that effective goal setting is as Art as it is a Science. There is a degree of self-knowing, deep intuition, that is required to ensure our goals are gut checked and stress tested before we deploy our time and energy in the stated direction. At the end of the day anyone can say they want to go the Olympics, but only a few among tens of thousands have the deep drive, determination and resilience to actually see that journey through – trust me, I know first hand ;).
In an effort to share this post publicly I have kept this first entry to 3 key things we can all keep in mind when setting goals and dreams to pursue in life.
1. Effective Goal Setting Facilitates an Accelerated Learning Journey
It’s about the journey, not the destination…
Despite the cliche being well known, my observation of those who facilitate and practice goal setting do not place enough emphasis on this concept at the beginning of the goal setting process.
Why is this important?
Because ultimately at its most fundamental level, goal setting is about time.
How we choose to use this time we have on the planet and what we are able to extract from that time by way of growth, learning and fulfilment.
After 20 years of going through this process, breaking it down and building it back up again, these are the principle ingredients that do not change whether growing your first garden or pursuing an Olympic dream.
Therefore, we must avoid individuals who goes through a goal setting process to only understand and grasp the concept of “Journey > Destination” after having invested any number of non-renewable weeks, months or years into the process.
We need to do the best we can at understanding and coming to terms with the concept of the journey as we are initiating our goal setting process. It will fundamentally change the consideration factors of that goal or dream we end up focusing on up on the Horizon as a result of being more critical about what we believe the path to get there will look like.
Take time to visualize what your life will look like every day when pursuing your goal? List some of the biggest obstacles and challenges (the WALLS) you will face? Consider the sacrifices you may have to make – be honest with yourself. This process isn’t mean to deter, but instead ensure that you are ready for this journey.
Because as long as you can sustain the journey – you have won and will come out the other side a changed human being for the better – regardless of outcome.
2. Consider the Relationship of Goal Audacity, Time Horizon and Learning Value
Here again we start with the concept of Time.
The more audacious the goal, the longer time horizon you will need to account for to achieve said goal. Audacity multiplied against Time equals the level of challenge and adversity you will face on your journey towards that goal. This level of challenge and adversity is inversely correlated to the likelihood of you accomplishing it and exponentially more important the likelihood of you enduring long enough to even have a chance to accomplish it.
Another way to put it… We need to think long and hard about setting audacious goals that take years or decades to accomplish. With each added year required to achieve your audacious goal, the chance of you being able to sustain the War of Attrition to simply survive to that last day is reduced.
So why set a massive goal with a long time horizon? What’s the reward if you can survive that daily War of Attrition?
You will learn and grow more during that period than any other time in your and at a rate exponentially greater than peers around you not on an audacious journey of their own.
3. Start with Intuition, then Peel Back the Layers to Uncover Deeper Truths
90% of the goal setting I have seen taught throughout my life has been regimented and structured. An arithmetic equation devoid of emotion. This is initially helpful as it gets a greater percentage of people through the door – it’s simple and straightforward. Think about what you want, write it down, add “SMART goal” criteria, break larger written down goals into smaller chunks, and assume everything in the middle will work out.
The problem is that this path of least resistance undermines the most valuable function goal setting provides to us – a structured vehicle to accelerate our learning, growth and self-understanding so that we can update future decision making based on a greater foundation of knowing who we are and what is important to us.
The end result of this process by the way is not achievement, but fulfillment.
I see intuition and deep truths in my daughters at the ages of 3 and 5. Well before we are formally taught anything about goal setting and how to “design our lives” with 10 step checklists and fancy equations we possess a deep intuitive knowing of ourselves and our role in the world. I believe due to a number of factors this voice within us is more often shut up and boarded away out of sight. If we’re lucky, we get introduced to concepts like goal setting at a very early age, where that voice of intuition and deep knowing can still be heard. More often these concepts are introduced to us well after those powerful voices in our heads, hearts and gut have reduced to a distant smoulder, only consciously making it onto our radar as brief nostalgic waves of something we once recalled, perhaps in a dream or previous life.
We must find ways to begin chipping away at the neuro-calcification that has locked our intuition and deep knowing away – goal setting is simply one vehicle to do this and herein lies the “Art” part of the equation.
I believe that tricking ourselves in the goal setting process can be an effective first step. For example, right now, without rationally thinking, what is something that feels lofty and incredibly important for you to accomplish or achieve in this life before your time is up?
Now, if you were able to suspend your conscious, rational thought long enough, you may have caught a glimpse of something big, a dream or an idea that you don’t often let out into the open. Why not? Because, likely, the next rush of emotions are ones of uncontrolled fear, anxiety, nervousness, shame, doubt – it takes 50 milliseconds for a part of our brain called the amygdala to autonomously (without our request) flip our Fight or Flight (sympathetic NS) into full effect – dumping a boat load of neurotransmitters and hormones into our body that effectively cause us to clam up in fear and self-doubt.
This feeling is scary, gross and uncomfortable if you haven’t been conditioned to use it effectively – and therefore we unconsciously choose to hide these dreams and thoughts away – typically right beside our intuition.
But, if we can can breath through that initial rush, long deep and slow. We have the opportunity to keep the dream in front of us. We are not holding it consciously in our heads to commit to it here and now – but instead to dissect it, to probe and investigate. Why is this seed of an idea important to us? Why does it excite us? What are the intrinsic and extrinsic factors that draw us to it? We can go through step 2 above and begin to inquire as to what the journey could look like.
Ultimately the goal of this process is to make connections between our dreams up on the horizon and our deeply rooted values and intrinsic motivators. If those don’t exist for you this process of peeling back the layers through reflection and inquiry is one of the ways to start articulating and identifying those roots. These core values and intrinsic drivers will be the most important foundation you will rely on in your journey towards an audacious goal. If you don’t have a rock solid grasp of these you are flying blind and burning time and energy.
A New Approach to Goal Setting
Whether you are setting goals for yourself or coaching others through the process I invite and encourage you to apply the principles and concepts above to your process.
If you know someone who would find this guide helpful, please pass it along on.
